Transcript
WEBVTT
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Welcome back to the women's mental health podcast.
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I'm randy.
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I'm And I'm Jess.
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And we are two licensed psychotherapists, and this is a safe space where we talk about mental health, well being, and strategies for coping with life's challenges.
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And how all of this is normal, and you are not alone.
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Today we're diving into a modern mental health issue that's been gaining attention in recent years, internet gaming disorder.
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This might be something you've heard about, especially if you are someone you are close to enjoys online gaming or platform gaming, computer, Xbox, Roblox, whatever it is, you can find us and more resources on women's mental health podcast.
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com.
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So have you ever had these thoughts?
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What is internet gaming disorder?
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How
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does internet gaming disorder affect women specifically?
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What are the signs and symptoms to recognize in internet gaming disorder?
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Can internet gaming disorder impact mental health?
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Are there treatments available for internet gaming disorder?
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How can I support someone struggling with internet gaming support?
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I can't say that.
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Internet gaming Disorder.
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IGD.
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IGD.
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Is there a
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way to prevent this?
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What should I do if I have IGD?
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Can lifestyle changes help with managing your internet gaming disorder?
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And
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actually, how is it in diagnosed?
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How do I know if I got this or if I can diagnose my husband with this?
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Yeah Sorry, especially my end.
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Yeah, right
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even though it's It's surprising because it feels like gaming is very, is very male dominated, but there are more women gamers than there are men.
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Yep.
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Internet gaming disorder, or as we're going to call it, IGD for our sanity, is defined as a mental health condition, where someone has difficulty controlling their gaming habits and this leads to a significant problem in their personal life, their social life, or their professional life.
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If you can't go to work because a new like game just dropped.
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That's maybe
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an issue.
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Yeah.
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Or you're ditching your girlfriend and cancelling your date or, ignoring your family because
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I will say though when things do drop I understand that people say I'm gonna take the day off and I want to play this game.
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Yeah,
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if it's communicated, right?
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That's different if it's planned if it's not like disrupting and throwing off like you have a major Presentation due And then you're like F work, right?
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I
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totally forgot that.
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I want to do this instead.
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So the American Psychiatric Association Consider is it a condition requiring further research?
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It's still kind of a new thing, Because obviously gaming is still kind of a new thing while the World Health Association Organization or who has classified it as a recognized disorder called gaming disorder, which is interesting because I was like, huh, a gaming disorder.
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It's about time,
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I'm right.
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I was excited to see that it was included because I feel like it's relevant to our society and today's age, but still needs a lot of research on it.
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It does.
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So the main symptoms include an ability to stop gaming Despite negative consequences, neglecting personal responsibilities and using game time to cope with negative emotions.
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So neglecting personal responsibilities would be like, you're not showering anymore, you're not picking up your kids, you're not taking care of yourself or paying your bills because
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you're addicted to your game.
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Yeah.
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So it's called internet gaming disorder because it specifically involves gaming that happens online or.
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on your phone or on your Nintendo, it could be Nintendo switch, Xbox, PlayStation, your PC.
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And so whether it's through your console or your computer or your cell phone those things happen.
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Unlike offline games, Online games often include social elements like multiplayer, games, co op gaming, in game rewards, and continuous updates like patch updates and things.
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If you, I'm going off, my family is, are gamers.
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And
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I'm laughing because I hear my family is, are gamers all but me.
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And so I hear them talking at, they're talking about, Oh, I sold this and I got this.
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Oh, that's cool.
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And I think it's something real.
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Sue me, listen to me.
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I just, I just totally just diminished it.
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I think it's something real for, to them is totally real.
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And they're like, Oh, I just sold this and I got that.
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And I got a million dollars.
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And I was like, Can we do that in real life, please?
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Right.
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My husband starts talking to me.
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He has a team, he games, they stream, they record.
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Anyways, it's very intense.
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And so I've not been a gamer for 40 years.
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My husband just built me a gaming PC.
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So I have started to and finding understanding, okay a little bit, but still anyways, I'm always like he'll talk to me about this stuff and I'm like, that happened at work?
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And I'm like, exactly.
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Oh wait, never mind.
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This is your make believe base and friends.
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See, listen
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to this, but there are people that those really are their friends and they really talk, they've got, Kalamazoo 432 or whatever it is, is there a good friend that they hang out and play with?
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Oh, I'm like, who's
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Kalamazoo?
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No,
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just whatever their game or name is and that's who they play with.
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Play with and that's who they you know, they associate with and some people that's really their friends, right?
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So we're not trying to diminish it or make fun of it.
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Oh, no, like I just don't really understand it
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I've well, I mean we have community groups and Facebook groups and stuff like that just and I met through one, I
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just met one of my Facebook friends last week Look how old I sound I know she's my Facebook friend and I
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feel like Finally met her and then I met her daughter the week after
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and then
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so I feel like it's more normalized now than it used to be.
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But the problem with the nature of online gaming is that it's all, it's 24 seven, it's always accessible.
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So this creates an environment where, gaming can spiral out of control, especially if you are already struggling with emotional regulation, or, Stress that is bringing you down and you're using that as a form to dissociate and escape yes It's okay to a minimum But if it's at the maximum have you ever read ready player one or watch?
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Oh, yeah So it's yes the world's kind of destroyed everybody's inward in the virtual world and they want to live there 24 7 which is understandable when our world is going to shit much like it is right now but in some ways it's normalized to find that escape, but we still need to balance it with real life.
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It's happening around us.
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we touched on it just barely, but how is it affecting us as women and how is it affecting our mental health?
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So it's often associated with men and teenagers.
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We joke our husbands or, teenagers who aren't going to school.
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But women are also significantly affected because We do play games now.
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Mm hmm.
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I don't really but other people you play games I know I asked you one day what you were doing.
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You're like hanging out with my husband gaming Yeah, I was like, all right, cool.
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Cool.
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I mean I played
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for a night with my kids the other night I play a game called once human which is like a survivalist game and but it also has like decorating and stuff in it So I'm like Look, I made a walk in closet! And then I also have an AK 47 that I shoot at zombies, so it's it's okay.
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Really, what she's
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doing is avoiding her own walk in closet that probably can't walk in right now.
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Exactly.
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But I
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mean, it's a huge thing right now too, cozy gaming.
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So little like simulation games that are just like cute, like farming games and fashion games and we have really gamified everything.
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Anything we use has been turned into a game to keep people hooked on their phones.
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And I don't know if you've noticed recently, but if you ever shopped on like the app, like Sheen or like Teemu, there's all these like games and these things that pop up like constantly Oh, spin this and hit this and keep on and get this and feed the puppy and all this stuff.
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Well, Amazon is beta testing.
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A new deals page that is, looks almost exactly like Shein's app and I was like, Oh, here we go.
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So I think that we'll be seeing that more and more because they want to keep you scrolling.
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They want to keep you hooked.
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They want to keep you coming back for more and more and thinking like you're going to win something or get something.
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something.
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It's almost like gambling.
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Yeah, gambling is like gambling.
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Yeah, like being in a casino, come back tomorrow and you'll win a bigger prize or get a bigger coupon or get faster shipping, and so we really need to be hyper aware of.
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The way this is going so we can keep ourselves in check
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Exactly because a lot of us are using shopping, I joke strip mall therapy shopping online shopping.
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I'm
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a shopaholic.
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I admit it Well, but it's a coping skill for
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some people because you know when we're lonely we shop.
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I mean I found myself I'm gonna laugh during 2020 right being so crazy busy as a therapist during covid that one of my go to's was the news and Amazon.
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Why the hell was I going to Amazon as one of my go to's?
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it was like one of those things I was just doing.
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It becomes
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like a personality thing for us.
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I'm the Amazon girl.
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Became a habit.
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And so we need to be aware of this too because it's like, if we're struggling with it as adults, how are our teenagers or kids struggling with it when their brains aren't fully functioned?
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And this is gonna be their new norm walking through the world this way.
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a lot of women will use gaming as a stress relief or a mental break because they're juggling careers and caregiving and personal responsibilities and children with issues or, marital problems.
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It can be very expensive to all the things like a lot of platforms are free, but then you have to buy all the in App stuff like I'm not even gonna say like how much my kids have spent on fortnight and roblox and
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oh, yeah
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roblox
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That one right there i'll see it and i'm like you earn your money if that's how you want to spend it That's fine.
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It's supposed to be
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a really dangerous place too, but I try to I keep an eye on when we're using it exactly, it can become compulsive.
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Yeah.
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So we're saying much like gambling and that can disrupt our routines and interfere with relationships and friendships and really worsen your mental health issues like anxiety, depression, and even sleep disorders when we already have so much on our plate as women.
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And then we're like, Oh shit, I need a check in.
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And I'm like, I don't like farming games, my sister does.
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And she's still has been like Farmville for like life, and she's I need a.
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Pull up my weeds or whatever it is.
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And as a mom,
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I hate when I'm like, dinner's ready.
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And they're like, after this round, no motherfuckers, dinner is ready.
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I told you a dinner was ready.
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I don't care what round you're playing.
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I'm about to cut off the internet.
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And I am known to get on my phone and I will.
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Because I'm like, I asked you to take out that trash three times.
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I have
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a thing too that turns off everything on our Wi Fi system.
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And I'm like, it turns off Netflix.
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It turns off YouTube.
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It turns off the internet and I'm like no more until this shit gets done.
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I'll just disconnect it.
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And that's a boundary.
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It is a boundary for our family.
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But there's also a lot of stigma, too, of women who do, use gaming to relax, too, that they're, like, wasting time and it's not okay, whereas men can make a whole career about it.
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I think the most And how's that any different than watching football?
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There's
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men we've been watching football every Sunday and Monday night football and that's okay.
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So why can't we game
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right?
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So and it's like I think like the number one, Most of you or one of them on YouTube is like some gamer guy named like PewDiePie or something It's all like Minecraft gaming and stuff like that, but that's okay to make like a career out of it but like Women aren't allowed to so in comparative, you know to men it can be viewed harsh as a negative for women who game
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and so because of that we really want you to have these open conversations If you notice somebody if Farmville is taking over your sister's life Because she can't take care of her kids because she got a pool weeds, which isn't happening.
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It's not happening We're just saying if that is if that's true That's okay.
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We want to normalize this and really approach them with, empathy.
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I try to, I just lost my shit a little bit ago about the whole like dinner time thing, but I try to tell the kids, Hey, dinner's in five minutes.
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So that way they know don't start another goddamn round because dinner is almost ready, and so I try to be empathetic with them as well.
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But if I hear them getting angry and they're yelling and stomping and screaming because of a game.
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No, no, no, it's time to come down because obviously something is happening in that game that we want to fix that.
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And
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that happens with women as well is that we get really wrapped up and frustrated in our game or we get angry about it sometimes if we're gaming.
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Also a side note There's a lot of, a lot of toxic behavior that happens towards women who game, if they have voice chats or chats my daughter is a huge gamer and she does not game with her voice on.
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She doesn't game.
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She doesn't put anything that she's a female.
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And even like my husband's been gaming for three years.
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I don't know, like 25 years since Atari came out.
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Yeah.
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And so even, 20 years ago, he would get in fights with other guys, like on call of duty and say don't talk to the women like that on that.
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Cause he's very much like underdog, like woman protector.
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he stopped gaming for a while because of that toxic masculinity that happens.
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And especially in things like call of duty.
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And like they, horrible, sexual things to women are talking down to them because they feel like it's anonymous.
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you have to, be aware of that to going into these environments and protecting yourself and your kids from that.
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Again, if you find that this is interfering with your personal life, again, you're skipping meals, you're avoiding your responsibilities, or you're feeling anxious when you can't game.
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Oh, that's a big one.
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You're like, Oh, I'm getting the itch.
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I got to go game.
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I'm getting the itch.
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Yeah, that's no different than gambling or drinking
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or anything else.
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Check in with yourself, have self awareness, maybe start tracking how much time you spend.
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You do want to track it.
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Most of the games track what you spent on them.
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And then you're like, Oh, like I spent 642 hours on that.
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And you're like, Oh again, like Jess said, like setting boundaries, scheduling, specific times to game, whether you need to put that in the calendar, give yourself a hard stop time, setting those timers, telling Alexa to tell you when it's time to get off or turning the internet off at a certain time, creating screen free zones and times at home at the dinner table for yourself for your kids and balancing that with offline activities like taking a walk, riding your bicycle, exercising.
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I know one of my friends too, she makes her kids, they have to do an hour of some type of physical activity.
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We do steps.
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Yeah.
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Every 10 or 15 minutes they want on, the game, like when they're on break or home for the summer.
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She works at home too, like we do.
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And so she's I want them out, I want them doing stuff.
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And then they can have that time to game if they have earned it.
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We do steps.
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You have to have a certain amount of steps so that way you can get online.
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Cause I know you're not going to be moving.
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So I need some sort of movement happening.
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So let's go through an answer.
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Our, have you ever thoughts, Randy, what
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is internet gaming disorder?
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So it's recognized by health professionals as a condition marked by excessive and compulsive use of internet games leading to a significant impairment in your personal family social, educational or occupational functioning.
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That means it's affecting your relationships, your work, your life, your, daily functionings, your personal hygiene And it reflects on your.
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inability to control your gaming habits.
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So just again, how does internet gaming disorder affect women specifically?
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This disorder affects all genders, all ages, women may experience this differently due to what we expect from society, we we're not going to diagnose it as easily.
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I don't think because we're expecting it to be boys, we're expecting it to be men.
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And so I think again, it's gonna be like ADHD where We're going to get missed because we don't show up as the basic criteria.
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But often, we do game in these communities.
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And so there is, like you were saying with your daughters that we have to be able to take care of ourselves and our mental health, because as women, we might actually be more susceptible to other, like to trolls.
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I don't know if we call them trolls anymore, but sexual harassment, sexual harassment.
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And vulnerability and gaslighting,
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all that kind of stuff can happen on those, right?
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Exactly.
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So you really just want to take care of yourself as a woman if you're going to be gaming.
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So Randy, what are the signs and symptoms that we need to recognize that we have an issue with gaming?
